Sunday, July 12, 2009

Of Ringing Ears and Relationship

One day last October my ears began to ring. On the assumption that they would stop any second, I am sure I said what I always heard in a similar circumstance at my Mother's knee - "Somebody is talking about me." If that was true they have not since stopped. My ears have been ringing constantly since that day. Sometimes it is more ftrustrating than others but I am always aware of it, exept, perhaps, while I am sleeping. What to do about this? It appears that there is little if anything that can be done. I have tried a couple suggested remedies but the side effects are worse than the malady. And so I go about my days ever conscious of my ringing ears.

Paul in Philippians says this: "I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus.." Osawald Chambers says:"the spiritual saint never thinks of his life as secular or sacred; he sees the means of securing the knowledge of Jesus Christ. The Holy Spirit is determined that we shall realize Jesus Christ in every domain of life...." I believe these things that I have just noted with all my heart but the constant awareness of it, the deep acceptance of it so that I am as constantly conscious of it as I am the ringing in my ears often eludes me.

How to change this lack, to improve this consciousness has often had me stymied. When I shared this confusion with my husband he reminded me of Brother Lawrence who 'practised the presence of God." Unable to find the copy of Brother Lawrence's book on the same topic that I know we have I googled 'Brother Lawrence." Before I had finished typing his name Google brought it up for me. I was amazed to find several entries on the beginning page about this man who died in 1691. What would have caused his memory to be relevant all these years later and part of our modern communication? Could it be his humility before God? He spent most of his life working in the kitchen of a Carmelite monastery. And as he cleaned those pots and pans he 'practised the presence of God.' And so I will practise, practise, practise.

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